I have been experiencing some challenges communicating with a close friend recently. Challenges which arise from the crossing of personal boundaries. Boundary setting is not something I am strong at unfortunately; I have worked hard in recent years to learn to vocalize and protect my own boundaries because I’m a people pleaser and I hate letting anyone down. But I do understand the importance of boundaries to protect my own wellbeing, and have come to realize no one will automatically recognize or respect my boundaries, rather it is up to me to assert them. Ouch. Continue reading
Wellbeing
From the outside in
Don’t judge a book by its cover, assumption is the mother of all F ups, there’s more than meets the eye, just the tip of the iceberg. So many phrases we use often but rarely manage to adhere to. But they all amount to the same thing – advice to look beneath the surface. Because what we see on the outside rarely reflects what someone is experiencing on the inside. Continue reading
As sure as sex and death
I have often been fascinated by what topics of conversation are acceptable and what make people uncomfortable. In my world (which granted is a rare and subjective place) no topic should be off the table. Because as soon as you feel you can’t talk about something, the more weight it carries. The more effect it has on you and the more people wonder about it and dwell on it. Continue reading
To thine own self
Self-esteem can be a tricky son of a bitch. How many people do we all know who want to change something about themselves? Or focus on something they perceive to be less than good enough about themselves? Continue reading
Thank you Hollie Holden
Today I’m sharing a poem by Hollie Holden because it touched my heart. When something actually brings tears with its simplicity and beauty it’s worth sharing even though it’s not mine. So thanks to Hollie for capturing what so many of us feel every day. Continue reading
Romances and escalators
I’ve been thinking about relationships recently. Shocker. Someone said to me in passing that all their previous relationships had ‘failed’. I asked what they meant by failed; what constitutes a failure as far as relationships go? He said that they had all ended and therefore none of them had succeeded. Continue reading
The truth…in small doses
I have never been particularly interested in blogging about films I’ve seen, or interesting anecdotes about my day, or travel, or food, or anything marginally trendy. I’ve only ever been drawn to write about deeply personal things, feelings, and experiences. Which is why there are often long gaps between my posts, because sometimes it’s impossible to do that without sharing something intimate or private that also affects someone else who might not want to share so openly. Continue reading
Self-identity and the social grape vine
The dictionary definition of self-identity is ‘the perception or recognition of one’s characteristics as a particular individual, especially in relation to social context.’ That last part is quite important I think. Like the proverbial tree falling in the forest, if I think I have a certain quality but others don’t, do I really have it? There’s no easy answer. Continue reading
